Book Review. The Dread Crew: Pirates of the Backwoods By Sweetsalty Kate Inglis
It’s late November, slacker. Go here and buy this book for all the kids you know for Christmas. They don’t need another stupid video game. Are you trying to perpetuate the rampant degradation of the imagination? No? Then buy the kids the pirate book.
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I met Kate Inglis in Halifax and we ate a bunch of French Fries covered in gravy. So gross. I told her I didn’t know how to review a book. Was I supposed to give away a bunch of details or keep it general? She said “I don’t know. Look. A monkey juggling bowling pins while balancing one-pawed atop a tortoise.”
That didn’t really happen. But after reading The Dread Crew: Pirates of the Backwoods, this is how I imagine a conversation with Inglis going down. She’s weird. Good weird. On one page, there’s a bunch of pirates eating hot dogs. Turn the page and you’re covered with blackberry slush. Turn the page again and “THWUCK! THWUCK! THWUCK! Without warning a barrel shoots a volley of rubber ducks…”.
The entire book constantly sidesteps the ordinary, making her page 3 threat a promise: “… even the most interesting of ordinary was simply not enough.”
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So in terms of a positive theme that enhances and bolsters the moral fiber of our young people, Inglis seems to be saying that, fundamentally, we all pretty much want the same thing. A bunch of junk. Of course, “Junk” is probably a metaphor for something big and lofty like Love or Justice, but I’m not some fancy literary critic. You’ll have to read the book yourself if you want to interpret all the symbols.
Anyway, there’s these pirates and they’re all mean and nasty and they steal junk. Then there’s this really nice guy, Joe, who collects junk. In fact, he has all the best junk because people just give it to him. Why? Because he’s nice. So there you go. It’s a book about how being nice is the best way to get junk.
But, I swear, your kids won’t even notice that crap. The book is filled from cover to cover with goop and slime and all kinds of dirty fun. For instance, there’s “sweaty socks and sewagey swamps and stinky cheese and week-old lobster shell compost” and “crawly worms and rats’ tails and bulbous warts and gummy grins.” The book practically belches. With a message. Remember how the heavy metal records used to say “SATAN” when we played them backwards? That’s how Inglis’ll trick your kids into being nice. It’s totally subliminal.
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But don’t let my harping on the message distract you, the adult, from the plain and simple fact that Kate Inglis is a weird and interesting writer who can craft a sentence that’ll swallow you whole. For instance, “It is the sacking of her shantytown, her warren of patched-together trailers nestled among stacks of rusted rebar and railway ties and forgotten freight.” She hits all the bases and she does it over and over and over. So, you’re going to like it too.
Of course you’re going to like it. It’s pirates, after all, with crazy names and super cool illustrations (with lots of shadowy hash marks, like that interesting kid in high school used to draw—the one you wished you could see like). There’s a spunky deaf girl and a ship on wheels and a little boy who trusts his instincts. Did I mention the hot dogs? And there’s an old guy who thinks he’s too old for adventure and all these pirates, the deaf girl, the kid with the instincts—they all come together to teach him otherwise. Because too old for adventure? There’s no such thing. You’re never too old for adventure. Just like you’re never too old for cool books for kids about pirates.
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If you don’t trust me, go check out her personal blog first. And when you comment or shower her book with praise, make sure you tell her that BHJ sent you (because psst—Kate knows publishing type people nudge nudge).
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Reader Comments (16)
funny. she tried to get me to eat those fries, too. i didn't bite.
her book, though. that i bit. read. whatev.
because kate's a Writer.
Weird is as weird blogs. And it takes one to know one. Same goes to Slouchy. And she's totally lying about her ability to be coerced by strange Canucks. Slouchy is fish in a barrel.
GOD. BHJ read the Dreads. I feel like I just ran a marathon. I don't know whether to puke with nerves or congratulate myself. Or both.
Thank you, fellow weirdo.
I remember stumbling across her blog a while ago and reading about this (upcoming at the time). Thanks for the review. Sounds like something my oldest daughter will love . . .
LOVED Kate's book...this review is a great homage! well done, both of you!
I agree, well done Kate. I loved it, and my 11 year old read it in one sitting. We are ready for book 2...
I normally shy away from "pirate fiction" as a genre, but perhaps I'll make an exception of some weird dude who lives in a mine says I should make an exception.
i finished mine last night. and dreamed about blackberry sludge being shot out of a cannon. i decided Kate was being subliminally erotic.
and i had a fine rolick along the way. loved it.
btw, Slouchy totally even went on a ridiculous SCARY midway ride with Kate, so charming is Ms. Inglis. she would totally have eaten the poutine. (xo Sarah) ;)
I've heard of this and been wondering about it. Thanks for filling me in what I need to know, especially about reading Satan between the lines. I'll beware. :)
All four of my nephews are getting this book for Christmas now, thank you for the review. I have nothing witty to say. Happy Thanksgiving.
Love me some Kate. Her book's sitting on my nightstand, in the on-deck circle.
i can't wait to read this & share it with my little dude.
I've already ordered my copy, but it's good to know that I will want to read it, too. Thanks for the review, matey.
This is the best book EVER!!! My sister gave it to me, my kids adore it. I clicked over here from Twitter and when I saw this title I shrieked out loud in excitement. If only everyone would just stop with the fucking video games and buy this book
I'm totally buying it. And I barely read this post... It's been a long day and I am trying to distract myself enough to ignore my headache so I can make dinner for a bunch of rogues before they declare mutiny.
But I can tell we are going to love that book.
Those characters are looking like wrong turn movie`s devils. I really enjoyed this pose alot and thanks for sharing this article with us.
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